Choices.

"All men and women are born, live, suffer and die; what distinguishes us one from another are our dreams, whether they be dreams about worldly or unworldly things, and what we do to make them come about... We do not choose to be born. We do not choose our parents. We do not choose our historical epoch, the country of our birth, or the immediate circumstances of our upbringing. We do not, most of us, choose to die; nor do we choose the time and conditions of our death. But within this realm of choicelessness, we do choose how we live." -Joseph Epstein

Life is about making choices when you can. I did not have a choice to be BRCA1+. But I do have a choice to do something about it. I was very hurt by some of the responses that I received from people that I have known for years. I am not easily hurt by peoples' words, however, when I hear "self-mutilation", that hurts. I am not self-mutilating and I am not a "scared" and "weak" person. I am making a choice to give myself a long, happy, and healthy life.

I do not feel as though I must justify my decision but I really want people to understand that this decision was not easy to make. I have spent about four years researching and contemplating all of my options and this is simply the best decision I can make for myself. Is it the right decision for every woman who is high risk? No. But for me, it is the right choice. I am not doing this because I am a weak person, I am not doing this because I am scared. I am doing this because I watched my mom fight like hell through her cancer treatments. I watched her become weak from the chemotherapy and all she wanted to do was be strong. The experience I had with taking care of my mom was emotionally draining but it brought us closer together and I learned so much about her and myself. However, I do not want my husband, my family, or my children to have to see me like that. I do not want to put anyone I love through that, nor do I want to put myself through that. THAT is why I am doing this. I have knowledge of my susceptibility. My mom, my grandmother, and great grandmother did not. I feel blessed to have this opportunity to make a better future for myself and for those I love. Cancer can really be just a word to me, not a sentence.

So, please, before you judge the choices others make, be sure that you know the reasons behind those choices.